=Steve job is a guy who has never graduated collage and still invented apple 
and the Ipod and Iphone and Ipad and Mac computers i think that's good for non collage graduate how he changed our society was he invented what is useful like the mac what would we be with out a computer we would not be able to do persention for work are school and also its useful for homework as well and the ipod and ipad are used for intertenment and i think that for him he was successful with out a degree so i think that he is amazing.
Great work, I love how you posted the apple picture in your sentance. But boy is that a LONG sentance, I would work on reviewing run on sentances, there are some great spots in there for a period. Also, don't forget to use spellcheck (you can always edit your post if you forget). Good work on your post, it is nice and lengthy. By the way, Steve's last name is Jobs rather than Job
ReplyDeleteMaddy gave you some great advice. PLEASE check with me (or another grown up) to help you edit your work before you publish your post. Keep working on your length. Just a few corrections and you'll be on your way!
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