Tuesday, November 15, 2011
The marshmallow experiment
Well the marshmallow experiment was about a guy who said if you leave a 4 5 or 6 year old in a room for 50 minutes with a marshmallow.They would say " if this marshmallow is here by the time i get back the you will get 2 marshmallows." 
and if you did eat the marshmallow then your life would turn out bad and if you did not eat the marshmallow then your will turn out a success so don't eat the MARSHMALLOW!!. WOW!!!!!! the little girl ate the inside BUT did not eat the rest and i think that this is a good idea for little kids because it shows self control and you will need that to be successful and if you don't have that then your life will be a mess.
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Wow!! Such improvemen! I am so proud of your progress. I can see very clearly that you worked hard on shortening your run-on sentences. You also used interjections, conjunctions AND quotes in your post. Stay focused, and you will find your success.
ReplyDeleteI like that you mentioned the idea of little kids looking at this experiment. Although many of the viewers from the video were most likely adults, you introduced the idea that this could help young kids. If kids were to see this experiment, perhaps they would think about their decisions more. Great work, I agree with Megan that your run ons are improving drasticly! great work, remember to re-read your post before publishing it.
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